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For Friday: Read Chapter 8 – “As A Result” – Connecting the Parts, in They Say/I Say (pp. 107-122), then: Complete Exercise #3 on p. 122 using two paragraphs (connected) from your first essay. Post your response to your ePortfolio titled “Connecting the Parts.”

1. transitions, pointing terms, repetition and key terms are bolded
2. I think the only pattern i see is that I use a lot of the word ‘that’, and ‘social media’. I noticed that I do rely on pointing terms very heavily.

When I was younger I used to think that I needed the newest iPod touch or was jealous when my friends got their first phone. Over the last couple of years, I’ve seen all the negative things social media brings: the obsession over instagram likes, the worry about losing followers, the controversy, the bullying and the feeling of being left out. Through these observations I’ve come to realize and value the importance of in-person conversation. I personally prefer to meet and talk to people in person and I think eye contact is key. I’ve noticed a decrease in eye contact during conversation as people glance down at their phone or use them to send a message to someone else. Through the pandemic I’ve also been able to see the value of in-person connections, such as a hug or high-five over the year and a half. Everything moved online and that in-person aspect was lost. I’ve come to realize that I think I would thrive living in a world without social media, as I’ve always done better with conversations in person. Since that is an unrealistic thought, I think that myself and many others would benefit from finding the correct balance between in-person and online communications and connections. During the pandemic I wasn’t able to see my best friend, they are the person that can make everything better just by holding my hand. I think I realized the importance of touch as Dunbar and Konnikova mention, with this person. Online interactions with them were great and with social media communication came easily, but after months of not seeing each other the in-person communication felt more natural. There were more laughs and I could see them smiling where I couldn’t see that over the phone, we were happier that way. From my experience, social media can make communication fast and easy, but it is nothing compared to genuine in-person interactions that I would much rather have. 

Admittedly, online interactions with them were great and with social media communication came easily. Nevertheless, after months of not seeing each other the in-person communication felt more natural. There were more laughs and I could see them smiling where I couldn’t see that over the phone, we were happier that way. In other words, social media can make communication fast and easy, but it is nothing compared to genuine in-person interactions that I would much rather have. 

Between Konnikova and Chen’s articles we see a connection between the two of them as you read deeper into both. On the surface, we see one article addressing the importance of in-person communication and physical touch. On the other hand, we see how twitter allowed  a woman to grow as a person and learn about the values of online connections. In the end of both, the in-person aspects of human touch and connection continue to be the factor that makes relationships stick. From my experiences, social media and online communication are often used as a placeholder for the in person aspects, but it never truly feels the same. The gentle touch of someone comforting you, or a hug after a long day can really make everything feel okay. From my experience, it’s a rare occurrence that you will start laughing from something on your phone when sitting by yourself compared to when you are with someone or a group of people.

1. In 300 words or less, summarize the speech and show (with framed quotes and paraphrases from the text) what you believe to be the author’s three main points/arguments. Support with textual evidence and include your own initial response to the material.

David Foster Wallace addresses the 2005 graduating class of Kenyon college. He talks about the beginning processes of having a meaningful life. I think through his speech he has more than just three main points, as he is constantly saying things to make the audience think about their own life. So with that I will try my best to choose what I believe to be the main takeaways I noticed. Wallace believes, “blind uncertainty, a close-mindedness that amounts to an imprisonment so total tha the prisoner doesn’t even know he’s locked up” (Wallace 2). Two people can experience one event and it can mean two completely different things to them and how they construct meaning from that event. Another main point I believe would be “learning how to think really means learning how to exercise some control over how and what you think” (Wallace 3). Wallace continues to mention how people should try to alter the way they think to allow for them to be able to construct meaning from experiences. Wallace also believes that “petty, frustrating crap like this [trip to the store] is exactly where the work of choosing is going to come in” (Wallace 4). Life isn’t perfect and it’s frustrating, but it is important to make valuable meaning from all events, good or bad and learn to be aware. 

2. Do you agree with DFW’s main arguments? Why or why not?

In most ways I do agree with DFW’s arguments because they all go back to thinking beyond just yourself. The world we live in is complicated and complex and we are not the center of it. 

3. Is DFW talking about, or referring to empathy (though he never uses the word)? Or is he hinting at something else?

I think he refers to empathy in some ways as a couple of things he says takes sides and is very similar to what Bloom wrote about. DFW doesn’t need to say the word empathy and it can be implied when one realizes the world doesn’t revolve around them. 

4. Find one DFW quote that evoked a strong response. Paste the direct quote from his piece, then write a few sentences in which you challenge or support his statement.

“the exact same experience can mean two totally different things to two different people, given those people’s two different belief templates and two different ways of constructing meaning from experience” (Wallace 2). I thought this quote was very interesting to read because not many people realize this part of experience. How every single thing that one person sees and experiences is going to be completely different for another person. I completely agree with this as meaning that is taken away from experiences are all going to change depending on the person you ask.

1. 400 words or less, summarize the piece AND show (with framed quotes and paraphrase from the text) what you believe to be the author’s three main points/arguments. Support with textual evidence and include your own initial response to the material.

Throughout this article written by Paul Bloom, empathy is referred to as a spotlight. Empathy can be positive but “spotlights have a narrow focus, and this is the problem with empathy” (Bloom 1). There are too many people in this world for just one person to feel empathy for all of them. People can only truly feel empathy for 1-3 people before it just becomes too many different emotions. Bloom also believes, “Empathy distorts our moral judgements in pretty much the same way that prejudice does” (Bloom 1). We are more easily able to empathise with people who we share similarities with. I can better understand and feel empathy for one of my close friends than for a child who lives on the other side of the world. Lastly Bloom argues, “ what really matters for kindness in our everyday life interactions is not empathy but the capacities such as self-control and the intelligence and a more diffuse compassion” (Bloom 4). There are some better alternatives instead of using empathy that Bloom mentions. Bloom also references Sandy Hook and how as a country we were all devastated by that tragic event. But over in Chicago many more children have died than during Sandy hook. It is easier to give empathy for single events and these events pinpoint the fact that empathy has limitations. It’s not that we do not care about all the lives lost in Chicago over the years, but we are single people who do not have enough empathy for other people. It’s not that we don’t care, it’s more so the fact that we tend to focus on the people around us. Empathy can work in smaller situations when someone needs you to be there for them but on a more global level empathy is not good enough. 

2. Do you agree with Bloom’s main arguments? Why or why not?

I more so disagree with what Bloom says. I agree with the fact that people do not have enough empathy to feel what everyone else feels, which I don’t think people should be able to do that to begin with. I use and value empathy on a daily basis on a smaller, more personal level. I think it’s important to care and be informed about global issues and events, but I don’t think you need to feel empathy for them, as it is impossible to do. Empathy is more important between family and other close relationships that people hold. 

3. In what ways does Bloom challenge your initial understanding or perception regarding empathy?

I think he began to challenge my initial perception of empathy by relating it to a spotlight. I never considered that analogy before as I’ve always been told empathy is putting yourself in someone else’s shoes. By being in someone else’s shoes it doesn’t address the fact about the spotlight. Spotlights have narrow focuses and they are able to light up what they are pointed at. Which in terms of empathy, this means that sure empathy can work but empathy us biased and small. You are choosing who to be empathic and you can only truly be empathic for so many people.  

4. Find one claim Bloom makes that evoked a strong response. Paste the direct quote from his piece, then write a few sentences in which you challenge OR support his claim in your own words.

“But what we can’t do is empathise with all of them” (Bloom 3). As much as I want to be able to, there is no way for myself to feel what hundreds to thousands of people are truly feeling. Throughout this article many of Bloom’s claims made me think as most of it is very well written. He continuously validates his opinions with logical responses. As for this claim I think it is something very important to remember even on a smaller scale. Bloom’s dislike to simply put is that there isn’t enough. I agree with that point but I do believe that you can and should still continue to use it for close relationships with friends and family. As for Bloom’s claim I think it is important to take it little by little and remember this before you are becoming burnt out by trying to empathize with too many people.

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10/4 paper 1 reflection

1. What was your final thesis statement? Paste, then analyze its strengths & weaknesses

“Even though social media allows us to communicate with anyone anywhere, online connections are not equivalent to the benefits of in-person relationships, such as touch, shared real-time experience, and listening. “

I would say my thesis statement length is a little on the longer side so I could find some ways to shorten and consolidate it. My thesis also addresses a pro and then con of social media so it shows that I am not overly biased. Adding in specific examples of how in person interactions are more beneficial also strengthens my thesis as well. I also think there will always be ways for me to improve my thesis statements, so I will always be open to that. 

2. In a separate paragraph, describe what you learned or were reminded of about your own writing process, from completing Paper #1. 

During this essay I was reminded about how long it takes me to write essays. I never seem to know what to talk about. Some people just need a little help starting and once they do they don’t stop. I am in fact not like that. From this I always try to plan out my essays on paper and write down what each paragraph will be about. I also found it really helpful on how I did my annotations on the articles we read. I was easily able to go back, find, and reference specific spots, without any hassle. 

3. In another paragraph: Which aspect of revision did you focus on most during your revisions? What changes or adjustments made your essay stronger? Be specific. 

During the revision process, I focused on a couple parts of my essay. I wanted to make sure my thesis was strong and have each paragraph relate back to my thesis. I know in the past I tend to trail off sometimes and I am not always the best at using the last sentence of each paragraph to relate back to the thesis. I definitely focused on doing that in this essay. I also don’t believe I was ever formally taught how to write a thesis, so having professor Brod’s suggestion to add in specific examples was very helpful in strengthening my thesis.

4. In another paragraph: How might you approach Paper #2 differently, from pre-reading and annotating, all the way through completion of your final draft? 

For this upcoming paper, I will read deeper in “They Say I Say” to make sure I understand the requirements for naysayers. I do believe I stayed on track and was well prepared when it came to annotating and planning my draft all the way through revisions. If anything, I think after I submit this to my portfolio I will go over and read what the second essay will be about. This will allow me to be more specific with my annotations and how they can directly relate back to the essay topic.

Read & Annotate Chapter 6 of They Say/I Say: “Skeptics May Object”: Planting a Naysayer in Your Text. Then, copy a paragraph from your free draft in which you present a clear argument. Paste into an ePortfolio Post and practice planting a naysayer (or skeptic) in that paragraph. Then respond to that naysayer within your paragraph utilizing information you gathered from reading the chapter. Post the revised paragraph as “Naysayer Response” to your ePortfolio.

Social media is able to create friendships and acquaintances as we see in Adrian Chen’s “Unfollow” article. We begin to read and learn more about Megan Phelps-Roper, her journey to leave the church and the people she met along the way. This was all possible because of Phelps-Roper’s social media usage on twitter. We see her connection with Adrian Hughes, “Phelps-Roper showed him more concern than many of his real-life friends. ‘I knew there was a genuine connection between us” (Chen 11). Yet is it necessarily true that social media doesnt allow for meaningful connections as we see here? Megan Phelps-Roper wouldn’t exactly be the person I would associate myself with on social media. She in some ways had a fake personality over twitter where she was someone completely different in real life. As soon as we start to see a change in Phelps-Roper’s morals, “She told C.G. that they couldn’t talk anymore. She deleted her words with a friend’s account. C.G. deleted his twitter account” (Chen 15-16). She thought she had a genuine connection with C.G. but it was just one click and that connection was lost. Phelps-Roper never even knew his name until after she had left the church. Some readers may challenge my view by insisting that social media can create many close connections. They were lucky to be able to rekindle that connection in person, as Chen writes, “She and C.G. connected as strongly in person as they had online, and now they live together” (Chen 22). While it is true that social media can form relationships, it does not necessarily allow for these relationships to prosper without the in person connection. In this instance social media provided this connection it never would have grown to this extent without the in-person aspects.

9/15

Through Konnikovas article, the Dunbar number is discussed in correlation to the increasing use of social media. The Dunbar number is a series of numbers that relate the number of people in someone’s life from close family and friends to people you are familiar with. There comes the concern of this number lessening with the unknown effects of overusing social media.

Hi 🙂 I’m Sarah Wilton. I grew up in New Hampshire prior to and plan on permanently moving up to Maine after graduating from UNE with my BSN. I have worked as a group fitness instructor teaching spin, strength and yoga classes as well as a lens care advisor at LensCrafters.

I enjoy spending my time outside exploring new places and traveling. I have been out of the country a couple times and definitely have a list of places I want to visit. My favorite trip so far was in 2019 when my family and I hiked the Inca trail to Machu Picchu in Peru. That was definitely an experience I will never forget. I enjoy hiking and running and just staying active in general. In 2022 I traveled to West Virginia to purchase my first car, a 1993 Honda Del Sol SI. Since then, in my free time I have been working on that, making connections in the car community as well as continuing my photography.

 1) Choose one paragraph from your Konnikova assignment response. Go through the paragraph sentence by sentence with specificity in mind. Revise and rewrite the paragraph to make it more specific, but try not to lengthen the paragraph too much. Think about word choice, clarity, and using your own voice. Post each paragraph (clearly marked “before” and “after”) to your ePortfolio as “Konnikova Revision.” Then, write 1-2 paragraphs detailing the specific improvements you made and why you made them. Did they help? How did your adjustments impact paragraph length? Clarity? Practice uploading as a new Post on your ePortfolio site.

BEFORE

One concern, though, is that some social skills may not develop as effectively when so many interactions exist online. We learn how we are and aren’t supposed to act by observing others and then having opportunities to act out our observations ourselves. We aren’t born with full social awareness, and Dunbar fears that too much virtual interaction may subvert that education. “In the sandpit of life, when somebody kicks sand in your face, you can’t get out of the sandpit. You have to deal with it, learn, compromise,” he said. “On the internet, you can pull the plug and walk away. There’s no forcing mechanism that makes us have to learn.” If you spend most of your time online, you may not get enough in-person group experience to learn how to properly interact on a large scale—a fear that, some early evidence suggests, may be materializing. “It’s quite conceivable that we might end up less social in the future, which would be a disaster because we need to be more social—our world has become so large” Dunbar said. The more our virtual friends replace our face-to-face ones, in fact, the more our Dunbar number may shrink.

AFTER

  From the increasing amount of social media use, there comes the concern that real world social skills may not develop as strongly. This is due to the fact that many interactions have moved online and therefore limit the amount of physical and social interaction someone experiences. I learned how I should present myself and act in social situations, from my past experiences in them. For example, I recently just had to have a meeting with a woman in the student access center who I didn’t know. I was able to have a successful face to face meeting and I knew how to present myself. We all know communication over  social media and even email is far easier than face to face. Dunbar does fear that too much virtual interaction will change the way we interact with others, and believes that he is totally right. People aren’t born with complete social awareness, they need to experience and grow from embarrassment, conflict, and joy that you experience in day to day social interactions. Dunbar mentioned, “In the sandpit of life, when somebody kicks sand in your face, you can’t get out of the sandpit. You have to deal with it, learn, compromise,” he said. “On the internet, you can pull the plug and walk away. There’s no forcing mechanism that makes us have to learn.” It’s quite possible that in the future we, as a population, may become less social. This would be detrimental to society as we need to be more social with the growing world. The more people we are friends with online rather than in person, the more the Dunbar number will decrease.

Why I wrote what I did

I chose this paragraph to rewrite because it was the conclusion of Konnikovas article where the topic, dunbars numbers, and a good amount of personal opinion were all included. I felt that I could relate more to this paragraph and add in my own opinion while having an outline to go by. I decided to keep this paragraph around the same length as the original paragraph. To rewrite this paragraph I decided to go sentence by sentence so I could closely read and rewrite little by little. I wrote what came to me as I reread the original paragraph. As I am writing this response to why I did what I did I see myself going back and revising my altered paragraph. I don’t believe that in my rewrite I changed a whole lot, I did add in first person pronouns. As well as my own opinion and experiences. I tried to add my voice into my rewrite as well.

9/7 homework

My pages are different then in the book

1. Write a brief summary, using your words and direct quotes, of Megan Phelps-Roper

personal transformation, as described in Chen’s piece. Be sure to include 2-3 direct quotes (with proper MLA citations) that illuminate changes Phelps-Roper experienced along the way.

We suddenly see a change in how Megan Phelps-Roper perceives the death of famous actor Brittany Murphy’s death. Chen writes, “The contrast between the grief on twitter and the buoyant mood in the basement unsettled her” (Chen pg 10). Megan enjoyed this actress in the movie ‘Clueless’ which was a new feeling to her. It is hard to dismiss what Phelps-Roper thought, “We weren’t supposed to care about what other people thought about us, but I did” (Chen pg 10). She was beginning to see the flaws to her religion.

 Soon after this, she made a close connection with Graham Hughes, and “showed more concern than many of his real-life friends” just over twitter (Chen pg 11) While reading article I began to see her twitter account becoming less and less offensive as Phelps-Roper began to figure out who she really wanted to be and how she wanted to contribute to the world. It took twitter and seeing how people around the world live, what made them happy, and what made their lives worth living. It is often said that social media is fake, but to Megan Phelps-Roper, these joyful, heavily planned out uploads held a lot of value. She began to see all her followers and the people on twitter as human. When Phelps-Roper has a question about the doctrine she would ask her mother. Phelps-Roper realized, “That was the first time I came to a place where I disagreed … I didn’t accept the answer that they gave me” (Chen 12). She was able to begin to realize that not everything about her religion is true. She enjoyed her conversations with people online and learning about what they cared about. In 2012 Megan Phelps-Roper and her sister Grace left the church. 

2. In your opinion, how did social media embolden Phelps-Roper’s initial message as a spokesperson for Westboro Baptist Church? How did interactions via social media influence her drastic shift in personal belief? Use at least two direct quotes, framed with help from Ch. 3 of They Say/I Say), to support your claims.

Social media allowed Phelps-Roper to see into the lives of others and connect to people outside her church and town. In the beginning her uploads and responses to events were something almost unbelievable. It’s hard to imagine someone saying those kinds of things and having little consequences. She was in fact the voice of the Westboro Baptist Church on twitter. Common sense seems to dictate how I personally use social media but I have come to realize that isn’t the case for everyone. She created another account with fake names out of curiosity to see if Wesboro’s prophecies were true. With the death of Brittany Murphy, Chen writes, “she felt an unexpected pang– not quiet sadness, but something close– over her death (Chen pg 10). I’ve always believed that creating a connection to a person can help change who you are, and that is exactly what happened to Phelps-Roper. She continues on to create a friendship with Graham Hughes and later posts a concerned tweet, “Isn’t this close to you?” after reading about the earthquakes off of Canada’s coast (Chen pg 11).

3. “Anybody’s initial response to being confronted with the sort of stuff Westboro Baptist Church says is to tell them to f*** off,” said blogger David Abitbol (Chen 79). But it was less-aggressive communication styles that “got through” to Phelps-Roper, that in part influenced her to reconsider her belief system. What style(s) of conversation (consider message, tone, perspective) had the most impact on Phelps-Roper? What might her story teach us about confronting hate speech? What about redemption?

What helped spark change with Phelps-Roper was making connections over twitter with people outside her community. She made relationships with people who she was able to talk to and ask questions. More specifically when she was learning about Westboro’s new prophecies about the end world, she needed to understand more about Judaism. Instead of reading a book she bought she asked her acquaintance Abitbol who was more than happy to help. By asking a real life person then a book she was able to get the help to also learn the vocabulary. Over twitter she was almost a different person, “Other twitter users were fascinated by the dissonance between Westboro’s loathsome reputation and the goofy, pop-culture-obsessed millennial who Phelps-Roper seemed to be on twitter” (Chen pg 11). Phelps-Roper was able to be someone else over social media which helped her spark change in her life outside social media. 

4. If you were to meet Phelps-Roper today, what question would you want to ask her, and why?

I think if i were to meet her today I would honestly be conflicted on whether to ask her anything at all. If I were to have to ask only one question I would ask her what she would have done differently. This a very broad question to ask but I am specifically curious on just if she would have handled leaving her church differently if she would have done it sooner. I would ask this because I know change is hard and it’s scary. It’s important to face your fears and do things that scare you, but I am also curious just how she wishes she could have handled that change. I wonder how she would encourage others from her own personal experience, to embrace change and how to adapt to new situations.